The Legend of Zelda: Breath of the Wild

08/14/2017 9:03 PM ·Spoilers

[FAB LORD GHIRAHIM:] “This thing has certainly seen better days!” [BLIND Da EX LEGEND THIEF:] “Doesn't dis thing remind you of a GOSSIP STONE?!” [CALAMITY GANON:] “Guess that explains its strong desire to speak!”

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IηdяidCOLÐ

08/15/2017 2:01 PM ·Spoilers

[BLIND Da EX ANCIENT TECH THIEF:] “Now dat's MAH kind of ANCIENT TECHNOLOGY!” [CALAMITY GANON:] “Oh, I'd love to see what this OLD SHEIKAH has been COOKING UP these past 100 years!” [FAB LORD GHIRAHIM:] “Let's just hope its not an ANCIENT MASTER SWORD! The last thing I want to see is a HIGH-TECH BLADE OF EVIL's BANE with a Fi 2.0. A.I.!”

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08/15/2017 2:08 PM ·Spoilers

[BLIND Da EX ANCIENT TECH THIEF:] “Dere's always a CATCH!” [FAB LORD GHIRAHIM:] “Well payment for his services seems reasonable, considering I doubt he's had alot of FUNDING since the fall of HYRULE!” [CALAMITY GANON:] “Hey, I'd have given him all da FUNDING and MATERIALs he'd need if he came and work for me like the YIGA, but he wanted to stay working for ZELDA, so no R&D BUDGET for him!”

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08/15/2017 2:15 PM ·Spoilers

[FAB LORD GHIRAHIM:] “So wait let me get this straight, this ANCIENT OVEN CHERRY is basically nothing more than a GLORIFIED VENDING MACHINE that you put RUPEEs & ANCIENT MATERIALs in and it turns the ANCIENT MATERIALs into ANCIENT SOLDIER GEAR?!” [BLIND Da EX SODA THIEF:] *drinking soda* “Now DAT is what I call a VENDING MACHINE!” [CALAMITY GANON:] “THAT'S SO GENIUS, IT BUURRNNSS!”

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08/15/2017 2:23 PM ·Spoilers

[CALAMITY GANON:] “If only I could get the BLUEPRINTs for that thing I could put ANCIENT VENDING MACHINEs in MAH bases, dungeons, and HYRULE CASTLE for MAH BOIs and have them buy their own ANCIENT WEAPONRY! That way they'd be payin' me for RUPEEs for ARMAMENTs and I could put that MONEY into upgrading MAH GUARDIAN ARMY with all kinds of EVIL DO-DADS (Missile Launchers, ENERGY CHAINSAWs, etc)!”

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IηdяidCOLÐ

08/16/2017 11:43 AM ·Spoilers

[FAB LORD GHIRAHIM:] “Aw, that's too bad!” [BLIND Da EX TECH THIEF:] “Then what are you waiting for?! FIX IT!” [CALAMITY GANON:] “Just give it a KICK or FONZIE TOUCH!

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08/16/2017 11:51 AM ·Spoilers

[FAB LORD GHIRAHIM:] “So this thing is a SHE!” [BLIND Da EX TECH THIEF:] “CHERRY's a CUE name for a BEAUTIFUL MACHINE that makes ANCIENT EQUIPMENT!” [CALAMITY GANON:] “Well lets see if we can help this little LADY get back to making some of that SWEET ANCIENT TECH!”

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IηdяidCOLÐ

08/16/2017 11:55 AM ·Spoilers

[BLIND Da EX KAIWII THIEF:] “ADORABLE?! She's SUPER KAIWII!” [FAB LORD GHIRAHIM:] “FYI, KAIWII can mean CUTE, LOVABLE, or ADORABLE!” [CALAMITY GANON:] “Well then BLIND's basically saying she SUPER CUTE, SUPER LOVABLE, or SUPER ADORABLE!”

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08/16/2017 12:01 PM ·Spoilers

[FAB LORD GHIRAHIM:] “Well that's understandable, I doubt she too keen to share a OLD LIGHTHOUSE LAB HOME with a MACHINE named after one of her husband's EX-GIRLFRIENDs!” [CALAMITY GANON:] “They say you never forget your first love, though its probably not a good IDEA to constantly remind your WIFE that she'll never be number 1!”

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08/16/2017 12:10 PM ·Spoilers

[FAB LORD GHIRAHIM:] “Sounds like JERRIN is a FEISTY little MINX!” [BLIND Da EX LEGEND THIEF:] “Dat's odd! From what I can tell he hasn't been doing a very good job of NOT call his ANCIENT OVEN, CHERRY!” [CALAMITY GANON:] “Well apparently he's wife hasn't heard him say it, cause she hasn't thrown a thing! (or she won't do it in the presence of company)”

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