"But at some point … you just didn't feel you deserved it. Maybe you were abandoned or betrayed by someone you thought loved you, or went through a really dark period of self-hatred, or just built romance up into something reality could never match …" I'm gonna go with … "all of the above". Wow, I'm really messed up … "It doesn't really matter why. Hey, we're all messed up inside, to some degree!"